Sunday, November 13, 2011

The top 10 signs you're a running blogger who isn't currently running


10. You mention you can't run.....Every. Single. Post.

9.   You start posting about very random things (i.e.your dogs, things you hate, pop culture, Top 10 Lists).

8.  You repurpose your hydration belt.  Instead of Gatorade and gels, it now holds wine and Cheetos.  You start to wonder why you didn't think of this earlier.

7.  Your toddler tells you to stop whining. 

6.  Instead of a race countdown widget you have a "days until I can run" widget.

5.  Your race schedule stops including marathons and triathlons and starts including things like Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Contest.

4.   Minutes into the New York Marathon you turn off the TV, yell "I hate all you bastards!!!" and burst into tears.  Your children are confused.  They might ask their teacher what a bastard is.  You might get a phone call.

3. You start wearing a lot of spandex.  You tell people it is because you miss working out.  It is actually because they are the only pants you fit in now.

2.  When the doctor tells you not to run for 6 weeks, you ask if that is negotiable.  When he says no, you ask for Prozac. 

1.  You sob while reading race reports and then leave comments like, "You suck!  I hate your freaking guts....er..um..I mean congrats on the great race!"

Thanks to everyone who is still reading my now totally random blog!  Oh, and I have only done a few of the things on the list.  I'll let you guess which ones.